She sneaked in, hoping not to wake him. But her bracelet’s giggle betrayed her. He was startled awake. Her eyes dilated with fear.
“Is everything okay?” he asked She did not say a word. Instead she took a step back. He reached out to touch her. She pulled back. She tried to speak but her voice began to break. Her lips became dry; tears welled up in her eyes. He reached out again. She pulled back into a corner, gasp for air then held her breath and froze. He was gripped with fear, expecting the worst. “What is it babe?” He asked.
She lowered her head onto her left shoulder, exposing a fresh hickey. His heart sunk. Tears rolled down his cheek betraying his broken brave smile. He picked up his jacket and walked out into the dark from which he never returned. “I’m so sor…? She said in a broken voice as he closed the door behind him.
Loving you is like falling in love with the devil He builds me castles in the sand Like you give me a false sense of home And empires in the clouds Like you make me false promises of heaven on earth
With one hand he gives me all my earthly desires Like you give me joy with the touch of your hand And with the other, he takes my soul to torment Like you, with the very hand that gives me a touch of joy, You inflict immense pain So gruesome I yearn to love you Till it hurts your heart and soul.
The textured rock walls were black with shelves and carpeting to match in colour. The table top timber matched the floors; both timbers was polished smooth yet they did not glisten.
Perhaps it was because the glass roof which only let the Light In but not the sun nor the moon itself. You could see the green of the plants above yet the room was void of something. It was void of life and the joy that comes with it.
The perfectly placed inanimate lighting, books, calendar, chair and acacia plant did not help at all. It’s was a beautiful vacuum.
I prayed To the sea for a feeling so deep blue To the volcano for a feeling so Amber, it burns To the moon for a feeling so fluorescent It lights up a devil’s heart. I prayed to the sun for a feeling deep yellow
And memories of me with my friends come to heart. The moment in the sun The heat blazing on our faces As we ran ourselves into dehydration Swam in muddy waters to the dismay of mother Summer smiles so joy filled Disregarding the ass whipping waiting at home.
The moment under the moonlight The calm of the night under the twilight So blissful, Love blossomed Two by two cartapiller by two We could barely see where we set foot I guess love is truly blind
The moment we fought over silly stupid things Yet we remembered that we were more than those fights could ever be. Loneliness still accompanies these memories
The moment in the sea The cold water soaking our skin Kisses, snuggles and tight hugs Keeping us warm in this cold sea
The Sand Beneath our feet Siavonga beaches so hot Samfya beaches so warm Dancing our hearts away Like toddlers in the sandpit
The smell of the rain Every drop on our faces was Devine Soul cleansing like a bath long yearned for And yearn for it we did Our souls needed it
The dust on our faces Linen Stained beyond washable Like wine stain on a rug Mother will get angry Care for mother’s wrath we threw to the winds For we were thirsting a cleansing so deep and sensual
We were joyful little creatures of the moon & sun I wish I could stay longer my friends But now its time to grow Sing lullabies to my little ones For they too need to make FRIENDS LIKE YOU.
What an odd phenomenon it was for him. Never in a million years could he imagine people hunt such a giant serpent.
Not especially when in his world snakes were treated with superstition of being creatures of the dark spiritual realm. To watch these hunters fearlessly hunt the Python in an era many years before his time was a culture shock unexpected.
It was an even bigger treat than watching the warriors take down predators like Leopards and Cheetahs whose skin they wore as garments.
📷Photos Courtesy of Swedish Museum. Taken in 1912 in the Lake Bangweulu Villages.
Why do you love me? She asked. You say my name like you know the dark side of me You engage my Demons in the art of dancing in the rain You quench your thirst with my tears Their taste is second to none My fears you mock not My heart you guide in the dark Shelter in the rain. When the storm hits In my embrace you find a home. The Art of dancing on infernos You perfected on my hellish rage.
Stop letting your kids win. You are literally raising a loser. Let me explain. Not to sound like Kevin Hart but let me Explain. Kids Don’t know how to play games, either it be Chess, Checkers or Hide n’ Seek. They learn the art of playing these games from you just as much as they learn the art of dancing in the rain. It’s all curiosity driven. Kids function purely on curiosity. Their hunger to learn is inssentiable. Their curiosity overpowers the need to feel demoralised 9 outta 10 times they face anything.
I recently witnessed one of my nephews who is a few months old pull a rabbit by it’s ears and drag it like it was a rug doll. The boy can not say a word yet he saw the rabbit which was about half his own weight yet he crawled to it and grabbed it by both its ears in one hand. THAT’S RIGHT. HE GRABBED BOTH EARS IN HIS ONE TINY RIGHT HAND. And when they tried to pry the poor bunny from his hand, he held on for dear life and dragged the bunny on the tiled floor. The bunny was not hurt. Chill. It wasn’t even trying to run from him. Completely unbothered.
His curiosity overpowered his fear for what this strange animal could do to him. Yet somehow, this kid is afraid of strangers who come to his parents house. I’m one of the strangers he doesn’t want near him. He cries when I pick him up. Then there is my 6year old granddaughter who nearly every week develops a new interest in some game she picked up from friends at school or a game we introduce her to. Yes, I’m old enough that I have a granddaughter at 30-ish.
Recently, she witnessed a Checkers (Draft for Zambians; PS: It’s actually called Draughts), game at her friends place. She came home and demanded I make her a Checkers board. So I obliged to avoid dealing with Tantrums. Little did I know I had signed up for being woken up early on weekends to play the game with her. Not to mention every other minute she feels like playing a game I no longer have interest in.
Anyway, I noticed that every time I let her win, she would copy my moves in hopes of winning again and in the process she would lose even when I gave her the advantage. So I decided to apply the NO PARTICIPATION TROPHIES POLICY. And slowly I noticed that, she was now picking up my very whitewashing victory moves and using them against me to the point to beating me at my own game every one game out of the too many to count victories I had over her.
This was a lightbulb moment for me. Because over the years I have noticed this same attribute in myself and in those around me. People end up applying this to their lives. We all learn from experiences we have had but most importantly, we build our character on childhood experiences. A Development Biologist named Dr Bruce Lipton argues that a Person’s character is defined by the things their brain downloads from the observation of the people and events around them during the first 7 years of their life. He further estimates that 95 percent of a person’s life will be whatever is programmed in that person’s brain during these years.
For this reason and based on my observations, I say people don’t just become losers. They are programmed to lose by those around them in the early stages of life. This includes every time you let a child win instead of showing them how to win. They end up growing up with a Self-Sabotage Mentality like adults who are so pessimistic, they can’t see positive outcomes without suspicion of a backhanded component at play; or perhaps constantly making choices that are detrimental to their own wellbeing even in the most straightforward of situations.
So STOP LETTING YOUR KIDS WIN. Teach Them How to Win Instead. Don’t worry about crushing their spirit. You can’t crush a Child’s spirit unless you intend on doing so. Their curiosity overpowers their fear of losing or harm because they don’t know any better. To them, the world around them is just a huge endless play ground to be explored until adulthood kicks in. They will keep going. Only when they start seeming like giving up, that’s when you let them win by making moves that give them the advantage in order to build their morale back up.
That said, when I have kids of my own, the No Participation Trophies Policy will be in full effect. 🤷🏾♂️ Oh how I pity them unborn thumbsuckers.